VOICE OF HOST: Lets meet contestant number 1. He's a skitzophranic serial killa clown who says women love his sexy smile. Lets find out if his charm will work on Sharon. Sharon, whats your question?
Sharon: Contestant number 1, i belive first impressions last forever. So lets say you were to come over to my parent's house and have dinner with me and my family. Tell me what you'd do to make that first impression really stick
#1: Lets see...hmm well id have to think about it. I might show up in a tux HA! But I doubt it. I'd probably just show up naked like I always do, and look your mama in the eye and tell her FUCK YOU! Hurry up bitch I'm hungry I smell spaghetti, I pinch her loopy ass and tell her GET THE FOOD READY. Your dad would probably start trippin, and get me pissed. I'd have to walk up and bust him in his fuckin lips! Its dinnertime! We're hearin grace from your mother I pull a forty out and pour some for your little brother. I'm steady starin at your sister, I'll tell ya this, ya know for only 13 SHE GOT SOME BIG TITS! After that, your dad would try to jump again, and only this time I'd put the 40 to his chin after your mom does the dishes and the silverware, I'd dry fuck her till I nut in my underwear
~~~applause~~~
HOST: Now lets meet contestant number 2. He's a psychopathic deranged crackhead freak who works for the dark carnival. He says women call him Stretch Nutz. Sharon, lets hear your question...
SHARON: I like a man whos not afraid to show his true emotion, a man who
expresses himself in his own special way. Number 2, if you fell in love with me, exactly how would you let me know?
#2: First thing, I could never love you. You sound like a richy bitch yo FUCK YOU!! But if I did, I'd probably show you that I care by takin all these other mutha fuckas outta here. I'd go through your phone book, and whack em all, then find contestant number one and break his fuckin jaw (WHAT!!??). Anyone who looked at yoNow the talking's over, plans are laid and the hour is set
Glances round the table, eyes all shining, dark and bright
We meet again at daybreak for the day that will be ours
We're tomorrow's history
So just check your weapons, say your prayers.
Now the evening's over, voices muffled in the cold night mist
We leave the house together, home to rest up in the last few hours
Heads against the pillows with eyes that will not close
Of all the dreams that we've ever had
This is the one, this is the one
Now the night is over - dawn cracks open like a breaking shell
Now the waiting's over - as we walk in silence through the empty streets
We meet beneath the tower, greetings empty like the taste inside
Turn towards the valley and the day that has waited for us all our lives
Even in this age of concrete, even in this age of reason
There comes a time when you put your life
Into the hands of the gods.